I’m sure you are.  Unless you are naming your child, Donald James III (just a random name I came up with).  Naming a child is probably one of the most important decisions we make as parents because it becomes our child’s identity.  We hear names like Apple, Honor, Suri, Petal Blossom, and Zuma Nesta Rock.  These are all very “out of the norm” names that were given to childrens of celebrities.  Some names have been used for decades like mine “Susan” and then there are those questionable names, that make you wonder what the parents were on.  Regardless of how we came up with a name, it’s definitely a tough decision.

I remember when I was coming up with names for both my children.  It was definitely a name game.  I would constantly think about names while I was eating, driving, shopping, and taking a bath.  I also started to create names of my own.  Some were exotic, others were just plain wacko.  If I liked a name, my husband hated it and vice versa.  As parents, we were able to come up with some possibilities, and made our final decisions once the babies arrived.

One of my readers brought to my attention, a Names application. An application that was brought to us by Whitepages.com. You can enter your name and see the popularity, the meaning, the origin, as well as other detailed statistics of the name.  If you are a parent deciding on a baby’s name, this would be a great tool for you.  I just went to the site and put in my name, my husband’s name, and my children’s name.  It was nice to know that both my children’s names were on the unique end, my husband was very rare, and I have a very common name (Go figure!).  If you would like to try out this application, please go to http://names.whitepages.com.

Note: This review is soley based on my personal experience and opinion and results may vary person to person.

I say this with every birth and every pregnancy, “ Why don’t they show the flipside of giving birth and pregnancy?”  When you watch TV or movies, they show a beautiful barefoot and pregnant mommy-to-be in a flowing dress, cooking up some organic meal next to an ocean front. Or a glowing mother being rushed to the hospital, only to be followed with a scene of her holding onto a perfect beautiful baby, smiling from cheek to cheek, as if she just came out of a spa. I do agree that pregnancy and birth are so beautiful and one of the most sacrad moments in one’s life.  However, there is also that side of pain, recovery, and hormonal ups and downs.

I remember with my first birth, I was so focused on how painful the birthing process would be, I never knew that there was a period of recovery. I thought that after I endured the many endless hours of labor and delivery, and had the baby in my arms, it would be cupcakes and lollipops from that moment forward. Boy, was I wrong.  I remember the recovery period was more painful than giving birth.  I had gone through a tear, bled endlessly, and on top of it, breastfeeding was not as easy as I would have expected. Needless to say, I didn’t feel like I was experiencing all the ”Kodak Moments,” life had to offer.

I think our culture as a whole, stray away from “the other side.”  I know growing up, my mom talked about how long she was in labor with us, but she never talked about how long it took for her to recover from the whole birthing process.  Like myself, I think a lot of new moms think that pain ends with birth. That is simply not the reality, and I feel, lead most women to Post Partum Depression or the “baby blues.”  We are not taught about the loneliness, the frustration, the pain from the uterus contracting back to normal, the bleeding, and the nipple soreness.  It’s like you had time to build your army during your pregnancy and get all the support that you could get, and then you go to battle (birth) and you win.  Then you look around to see that all your soldiers are gone.  You are left to pick up the pieces in a foreign land.  I personally think there should be classes for mothers and fathers about post birth, so that everyone is educated and can prepare for it.  I think the biggest shock is not knowing and being thrown into it.  Just like labor and delivery, if we know what we are in for, even if other things may arise, we have time to emotionally and physically prepare for the task at hand.

So my proposal is a movie about everything that happens after a mother gives birth.  The challenges, the triumphs, the bonding, the crying, and everything in between.  I think a comedy would be a nice touch to a serious subject matter and the dynamics between characters, such as mom and dad, would be very interesting to see.  So come on down and invest in my film.  I can’t guarantee millions, but what I can promise is a personal journey, the ups and downs, the laughter and sadness, and ultimately reality.

Hi everyone!  I finally delivered my baby girl Ella Hanul.  She came on her due date.  I delivered without any drugs.  Right now, I am going through a brutal recovery process because I lost so much blood.  Once I come back to my normal physical state, I will post more in detail.  Thank you for your continued support and can’t wait to share with you my birthing story!

Today is my due date July 23rd, 2009.  I didn’t think I would make it this far and here I am.  I have been reading endless message boards with lots of women who have met their due dates or are 2 weeks overdue.  I was starting to think that this baby would never want to come out.  Yesterday,  I woke up in the morning and had bloody show.  If it was about 4 weeks ago, I probably would have been on high alert and worried.  However, being that my due date was the next day, I started to get excited because it’s usually a sign that labor will happen soon.  Still being a little reserved, I didn’t get my hopes up because this pregnancy has been anything but textbook.

I focused on my daughter the entire day because she is fighting her UTI (urinary tract infection) and on top of it, a virus.  The poor thing has been going through a lot this past week.  Throughout the day, I had bloody show.  I didn’t have any contractions, so I thought it was another sign that labor would not happen for another couple days or maybe even weeks.

At 1 am, I was awakened by major pelvic pain that went on for about a minute.  I could hardly breath and it was excruciating pain.  At that point, I did think that something was starting to change, but I made myself go to bed.  The first contraction was followed by another one, 30 minutes later.  The contractions then started to get closer and stronger.  It’s 12:37 pm right now and my contractions are about 10 minutes apart.  The last time I went into L & D, my midwife told me to come in when the contractions were 10 minutes apart because I had already been dilated a good 3 cm.

My husband didn’t go to work, but he keeps asking me if my contractions are real or fake.  Common? Are you serious?  First, I don’t think I would have the capability to fake such a contraction, unless I was trying to act out a character in a movie.  Anyhow, I gave him a piece of my mind, and I think he knows I mean business.  Right now, it’s a waiting game.  Let’s see if today is the day!

Don’t know if this exists.  I’m sure it does, and I have just not been educated on it.  Well, if it’s anything like post-partum depression, during pregnancy, I feel like I can relate.  My due date is inching near, just two days away, and it seems the baby is as comfortable as comfortable can be. That I don’t mind because she will make her entrance when ready.  What’s really gotten to me is this never-ending sciatica pain on the right side of my lower back that seems to get worse. If  you read my post last week, I was unable to get an appointment with my physician to get a referrel for a physical therapist.  I’m not sure how much it will help now, since I am closer to going into labor, but I know it will probably help after labor.

So on top of being frustrated with trying to make appointments, I have been pretty much immobile.  I am walking around with my mother’s walker and cane.  I can’t even call it walking because it takes me a couple minutes to move across a couple inches.  I simply look and feel pathetic.  No offense, but I have literally gotten stares by 90 year old senior citizens, wondering what could be wrong with me, besides the obvious pregnancy.  So the last couple days, I have had moments where I would just break down and cry because there is not much I can do at this point, but bare the pain.  I’ve tried warm baths, showers, tylenol, massages, and nothing seems to work.

My mom who has major knee issues has been picking my daughter up from preschool everyday.  It’s sad because these are some of the last days I will get to have alone time with her, but because of my pain, I am screeching.  I wish there was a magic pill I could take that would get rid of my pain because it really is affecting me in every way.  I am still trying to stay positive because that is who I am, but at the end of the day, I’m only human.

On top my own pain, we ended up in the ER again this weekend.  My daughter was running a 104-105 high fever.  She is super active and has a really good appetite, however, she was lethargic, dry coughing, not eating, and throwing up.  Her fever never subsided and kept getting higher and higher.  So we ended up taking her to the ER.  Our last visit, she was diagnosed with UTI (Urinary Tract Infection).  This time, she was also diagnosed with a UTI for the second time around.  It was hard being in the ER because my daughter only wanted me.  So on top of my back pain, I had her weight on top of me.  Now, she is on antibiotics, and she seems to be doing a lot  better.

Today, I finally get to see my physician for a referrel to a physical therapist.  I guess we will see what happens.  If I don’t get a chance to see one before I deliver, I will be seeing one afterwards.  After that appointment, I head to my midwifes, which is my 40 week checkup. Wow!  I feel baby moving like crazy, so that part is good.  I will be having my daughter home with me, so that I can manage how she is doing.  Hopefully, she will be feeling good by Wednesday, to go back to preschool.  I am crossing my fingers that this week will go by smoothly and by the end of it, I will have my baby in my arms.

I am 39 weeks today! I am literally 7 days away from my actual due date.  I’m not sure if I can hold on any longer because of the immense back pain I am dealing with.  I am literally using my mother’s walker and her cain to move about in a really slow motion speed.  The last couple days have not been fun because I have been pretty much tied to my bed.  Nothing is really getting rid of the back pain, and I can say I have literally tried everything in the book to get rid of it.

So it’s been another week of waiting and trying to ask little baby to make her appearance, so that I could get my mobility back.  My Mother in Law and my Brother in Law are in town, from overseas, and I really hope that they can see baby before they leave.  It’s been an emotional roller coaster for me, this past week, and I do hope that I can stay positive through this.  The only thing that has kept me sane is reading endless posts on message boards that relate to what I am currently going through.  I guess reading about other ladies in similar situations, makes me feel normal, and not crazy.

Here’s to another day, another week, and hopefully another positive birthing experience!

Since last Wednesday, I have been experiencing major back pain.  The pain went from bad presssure to now, immobility.  I am in so much pain that I cannot walk, crawl, or even go to the restroom myself.  I have been on the phone with my on call midwife, every other day, because of the immense pain that I have been in.  There is not much that can be done until the baby comes out.  So I have been literally talking to the baby, on a minute to minute basis, asking her to make her appearance.

Today, I was able to go to my midwife appointment.  My midwife clearly saw the pain I was going through, and felt really bad that everything that was recommended to me for pain relief, has not worked.  The tylenol, the ice, the warm baths, nothing has worked.  The pain has only gotten worse  as the days have gone by.  Today, my midwife told me to get a same day appointment to see my primary care doctor, so that I could get some sort of diagnosis, to see a chiropractor or a physical therapist.

At this point, I just want baby to come because I cannot tolerate this pain.  I can’t even fathom how I am going to be able to give birth, with this pre-existing pain.  I just pray and hope that I can get through this hurdle and be able to give birth the way I planned.  I am waiting to see if my primary doctor can squeeze me in.  I hope they do and I can be on the road to severe back pain recovery!

I woke up at 2:09 am this morning with menstrual-like aches. I dismissed it and went and refilled my water bottle to drink more water. I laid back down on the bed and changed positions. The feeling did not go away. Around 3:40 am, those menstrual-like aches were then followed by this surge of energy that went through my body, and then I would feel weak, nauseous, and short of breath. It felt like an onset of a flu. The odd thing is that they came in intervals like contractions, every 5-6 minutes. But the feelings that I were feeling were not at all contractions, just major discomfort.

I went and laid back down at 4:05 am and nothing went away. After that, I just got paranoid, and started laying to the side to see if I could feel the baby moving. I counted how many times the baby moved, and if the baby only moved a little, I got a little freaked out. I tried changing positions, drinking more water, going to the bathroom, checking to see if I leaked amniotic fluid, and everything and anything I could think of. I woke up at 6:01 am and went online and googled all sorts of labor tags and came across other mothers who went through this when they were in labor, as well as false labor.

After my false alarm last week, I just wanted to make sure I had all the grounds covered before I went rushing to L & D or made a call to my midwife on call. Right now, I feel nauseous and completely drained, like the wind was blown out of me. This pregnancy is so different from my first, I don’t know what to expect anymore. I just made a call to the midwife and am now anxiously waiting for her to call back.

After last weekend’s false alarm, we were just all praying that the baby would stay put in my stomach until it reached it’s full term date, which is today. The baby is now 37 weeks and as of now, she is still in my tummy!

I have not done much in the last week, so that I wouldn’t provoke any unnecessary contractions. My husband has been taking our daughter to pre-school every morning, and my mother and I have been picking her up late afternoon.

I went to my midwife’s appointment on Tuesday and every looked great. The baby’s heart beat was right on target and she also measured really nicely too. After last weekend’s semi-scare, my midwife believes that I will be going into Real Labor soon. I guess we will see if I end up with a Fourth of July baby!

My last cervix check up, I was a good 3 cm dilated, 50% effaced, and -2 station. That was last Saturday. The midwife did not do another check at this appointment, probably not to irritate anything. I still feel cramping and tightening, here and there, so hopefully that means I am continually thinning out and dilating.

Friday around 3:35pm: Got a severe cramp in the lower abdomen to which I could make no movement. I was stuck in one position that I could not get out of. The pain was so severe, I could not breath and could hardly talk on the phone with my friend. I called my husband to tell him that I was in a lot of pain, and thought he should come home from work. I then called my midwife and without hesitation she told me to call 911. So I called 911.

Friday at 3:50pm: Ambulance arrives and they put me on a stretcher. I am still having major abdominal issues and contractions. The paramedics ask me a whole bunch of questions and they check me to make sure the baby’s head is not crowning.

Friday at 4:10pm: We arrive at UCLA Medical Center and they take me up to Labor & Delivery. The staff at Labor & Delivery and my midwife are waiting for me to make my arrival. They take me to the delivery room, and put two belts on me. One belt is for the baby’s heartbeat, and the other belt is for my contractions. The baby is healthy and my contractions are crazy. You could literally see on the monitor that I was having constant strong contractions. Then the midwife checked to see my cervix and it was only at 2cm. Because my contractions were crazy, they made me do a UTI test, take a urine sample, and they checked me on the ultrasound. All the results came back negative. They checked me again before they were going to discharge me, and I was still at a 2 cm, but my contractions did not subside. They gave me a dose of vicodin after I ate dinner. The midwife came back to check on me again, and the cervix stayed the same, but there was bloody show. She told me to come back if I constantly bled.

Around 10:30pm: I was discharged and went back home. The contractions subsided and I went to bed. Everytime I woke up to use the restroom, I checked to see if there was bloody show and there was everytime, so I told my husband that we should go back to be safe.

Saturday 5am: We went back to Labor & Delivery. I told my midwife about the bloody show and a resident came in to check me. She checked my cervix and I was a good 3cm at 50% effaced. She also checked the baby on the ultrasound and everything checked out good, except one pocket of fluid was low. They sent me back home and said to come back on Sunday to get a Non-Stress Test done.

Sunday 9am: Back at Labor & Delivery for NST Test. Everything checked out fine. The fluid was a little low, but they said everything was okay and to go back to my regular midwife visit on Tuesday.

Today: Midwife appointment.

Two more days until 37 weeks, which makes me full term. Hang in there baby!!!